Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Ordered Steps

I've been sifting through pictures. Not just the recent ones, but from moments in years that were so long ago that I barely know the girl smiling up at me. The freckles are all there, the lopsided smile, it's the same. But Time has made differences.

And if you had asked the teen-aged girl in those picture where her life would take her, she would have responded with a haphazard "I don't know" and a shrug of her slender shoulders. If she was in a particularly feisty mood, she may have created a story of things she imagined would come to pass.

But she didn't know the blessings that Life and Time had in store for her.

It's like that, though, isn't it? These days we walk through, though we don't know what tomorrow will bring. We hope and dream and plan, but in the end, we just don't know.

Never did I ever see the life I lead as being mine.

I always said I would marry a man I could be comfortable with. I did. I'm the wife of a man I respect and love deeply. He makes me think, he makes me laugh, he makes me feel safe. He challenges me, he protects me. He knows when to let my Type A personality lead, and when to steer me in a different direction.

I'm a stay at home, home-schooling Mom of five precious children. Five. They bring so much joy to my life. They keep me on my toes and on my knees. They have taught me to multi-task, to put others ahead of myself and a better appreciation of long, hot baths. They cause my heart to swell and squeeze. They make my head spin and put my ears on overload. They fill my days, my nights, and my arms.

These days, I don't make it into many pictures. I'm generally the one armed with the camera, desperate to catch and hold captive some moment. But the lady with the freckles and lopsided smile, she occasionally makes it into a shot.

And she's incredibly content with the life that found her.

I know, O LORD, that a man's life is not his own; it is not for man to direct his steps ~~Jeremiah 10:23

The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes his steps. ~~Proverbs 16:9

And that's pretty sweet comfort, yes?


Lora Lynn @ Vitafamiliae said...

I like both versions of you.

Laura Forman said...

I second LL, I like both versions too!

The Roap Family said...

Love this post and LOVE YOU!